The Powerful Role Of Coaching Skills For Leaders: Invest Time To Create More Time
By Helen Wada with Damion Wonfor
On the latest episode of Human Wise, I sat down with Damion Wonfor, founder of Catalyst 14, a UK training and coaching business set up to create purposeful conversations that change hearts and minds, and enable the potential both in leaders and in those they serve.
To Damion, being human at work comes back to belonging. This is a scientifically sound basis to start from, being that a need for belonging is hardwired into our evolutionary biology.
Damion: “I think fundamentally as a human, it's about belonging. And the other piece that comes up for me is people being able to live their purpose... As human beings, we have a natural impulse and a need to belong... Purpose is a sense that I'm making a contribution to something that's bigger.”
We’ve explored before on the blog the innate instincts that drive us to seek belonging and purpose. Many thousands of years ago, these two things – belonging and purpose – were not only important, but crucial to our survival. If we did not belong to communities we were more at risk, and if we had no purpose within those communities we were likely shunned out.
A proven and effective method of fostering belonging and purpose in businesses is by taking a coaching approach to build better teams and better client relationships; which ultimately drives high productivity, growth, and development.
Invest time in creating more time
The good news is that you don’t have to be a fully trained coach to embrace a coaching approach towards your relationships in business – it’s about starting small and with the right intention.
Many busy leaders use time – or a lack of it – as a reason for not taking a coaching approach or setting time aside for coaching conversations. And certainly in the UK we tend to favour pace-setting, commanding styles of leadership that prioritise short-term demands over a longer-term coaching approach. The irony is, however, that the latter actually frees up time for more strategic thinking and business development in the long run.
Damion: “I see time and time again that as a result of leaders training and coaching, they actually start to see that by having these conversations, they start to create the time for them to be able to focus on other aspects, whether that's business development or strategic thinking because they're not getting pulled into the minutiae.”
So, investing time in taking a coaching approach actually creates more time in the long run. Where, then, do we start?
Start small
Often taking a coaching approach can seem intimidating to people who don't consider themselves a coach, but it can be as simple as being intentional about the conversations you're having – or not having.
Are you taking an interest in your team members? Are you actively listening to what the other person wants from the conversation? Instead of just solving problems for people, are you encouraging people to consider the solution for themselves? It's two-fold: we need to take a vested interest in the people we work with and start to create more independent thinking in our teams.
Crucially, this approach doesn't just apply to teams, but to clients too. When you’re talking to clients, are you curious? When it comes to the purpose of the relationship, are you thinking about what is best for the client rather than just yourself? Are you investing time and energy into building a connection with them, a sense of belonging?
These are small, practical changes that anyone can implement right away.
The Experimental Learning Theory
The Experimental Learning Theory was proposed by David Kolb, Professor of Organisational Behaviour, in 1984. In short, it is based on the belief that people learn from experience: from doing it themselves.
Kolb developed a 4-stage “learning cycle”, which in short consists of:
Concrete Experience – Having a personal involvement. Kolb believed that the key to learning lies in involvement and that knowledge cannot be acquired just by reading or watching demonstrations, but rather by actively engaging in an experience (whether a brand new experience or approached with a new method).
Reflective Observation – Reflecting on the experience or activity carried out. Seeking to understand situations and ideas from different perspectives, practising careful judgement based on feelings and thoughts (but not taking any action). This stage encourages learners to ask questions and learn from the experience of others, so communication is vital.
Abstract Conceptualisation – Learners form new ideas or understandings based on the reflection in the previous stage, assessing how these new understandings might translate to the real world.
Active Experimentation – The new ideas and understandings are applied to the world, allowing people to see whether their learning has improved the way they approach experiences. It’s a chance to test out what they have learned by actively experimenting.
This coaching approach is something you can begin to implement into development plans within teams and the wider business. How are people learning? Are they being intentional, are they prioritising periods of reflection, are they testing their knowledge?
Damion: “Often people get stuck in stages one and four. They're doing and planning and doing and planning and doing and planning – and they don't get that opportunity to pause and reflect, and to learn and grow from that. Again, coaching as a leadership style is really enabling this for the team, encouraging them to move through these stages, which is critical if they're going to learn and grow.”
When is a coaching approach most effective?
Of course, a coaching approach isn't appropriate in all contexts and scenarios. It’s important to know when to draw on coaching and when other more direct alternatives are required. However, there are some situations in business in which a coaching approach becomes particularly beneficial.
1. Set the right tone for meetings
Damion describes a story from a leadership group who had participated in one of his coaching programmes. They realised that by pausing and asking what people wanted to achieve from meetings, their conversations throughout went from stuck and dead-ended, to creative and innovative. A simple “coaching question” has the power to fundamentally shift the agenda, energy and creativity in the room.
2. Giving feedback
Of course, part of being a leader is giving feedback. When we're trying to build environments of belonging and purpose, there is a right way to give feedback. Once again it comes back to those evolutionary drives that are hardwired into us. We seek warmth and connection first above all else.
Damion: “I think too often leaders try and demonstrate their competency first. But research shows us that biologically we're actually looking for that sense of connection and warmth... And then it's about the competency of the person giving feedback.”
Of course feedback that is challenging and that pushes and stretches people is important. But equally important in creating the sense of warmth and connection (or belonging and purpose) is feedback that is validating and reinforcing. Do you make time for those important conversations with team members? How often do you give positive feedback?
A coaching approach to business – and indeed a human approach to business – puts relationships first, which is critical for building trust across the business and with clients.
3. Active listening
It is crucial to the health of their business that leaders develop their ability to listen. When we’re thinking two steps ahead of what a team member is saying because we’re busy, we’re looking to the end goal, or we’ve got a lot on our mind, we’re not being present at all. How can we expect to build the connections that are so vital in our creation of belonging and purpose when we’re not actively listening or engaged in the moment?
We may all think we're good listeners, but a good way to truly tell is to ask ourselves “can people think more clearly when I’m listening to them?” In other words, do we help people gain a sense of clarity and direction when we listen?
A coaching approach in listening terms is unlocking the ability to ask the right questions. This relies on active listening, which is so much more than just using our ears. It's about using all our senses.
Damion: “If I'm listening to one of my team, I'm helping them think. I'm fully engaged, I'm hearing what they're saying and I'm sensing what's not being said as well.”
Damion shares a quote by American Coach Nancy Kline who says, “The quality of your attention determines the quality of other people’s thinking.”
This, he says, defines active listening: it’s presence, it’s attention, it’s being ready and willing to be engaged with the moment. It’s a sure-fire way of fostering the all-important purpose and belonging we are all seeking.
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For more on Sean, head over to LinkedIn, visit his website, or check out his book on Amazon.
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